ABSTRACT
<p><b>OBJECTIVE</b>To describe the processes followed by a neonatal team engaging parents with respect to end of life care of babies in whom long term survival was negligible or impossible; and to describe feedback from these parents after death of their child.</p><p><b>METHODS</b>A retrospective review was conducted of health records of neonates who had died receiving palliative care over a period of 5 years at a tertiary neonatal centre. Specific inclusion criteria were determined in advance that identified care given by a dedicated group of caregivers.</p><p><b>RESULTS</b>Thirty infants met eligibility criteria. After excluding one outlier an average of 4 discussions occurred with families before an end of life decision was arrived at. Switching from aggressive care to comfort care was a more common decision-making route than having palliative care from the outset. Ninety per cent of families indicated satisfaction with the decision making process at follow-up and more than half of them returned later to meet with the NICU team. Some concerns were expressed about the availability of neonatologists at weekends.</p><p><b>CONCLUSIONS</b>A compassionate and humane approach to the family with honesty and empathy creates a positive environment for decision-making. An available, experienced team willing to engage families repeatedly is beneficial. Initiating intensive care with subsequent palliative care is acceptable to families and caregivers.</p>