Connecting cues: The role of nonverbal cues in perceived responsiveness.

Nonverbal cues powerfully shape interpersonal experiences with close others; yet, there has been minimal cross-fertilization between the nonverbal behavior and close relationships literatures. Using examples of responsive nonverbal behavior conveyed across vocal, tactile, facial, and bodily channels of communication, we illustrate the utility of assessing and isolating their effects to differentiate the contributions of verbal and nonverbal displays of listening and responsiveness to relationship outcomes. We offer suggestions for methodological approaches to better capture responsive behavior across verbal and nonverbal channels, and discuss theoretical and practical implications of carrying out this work to better clarify what makes people feel understood, validated, listened to, and cared for.

Defining listening: Can we get rid of the adjectives?

Listening is a complex construct studied in various fields, including psychology, education, marketing, management, and medicine. Despite its importance, there is no agreed definition of the construct. Therefore, we review existing definitions of listening, primarily recent, focusing on those that describe listening in interpersonal contexts. We identify 20 adjectives describing listening and found two underlying themes: unobservable versus observable behaviors and focusing on the speaker's or listener's interests. Focusing on the unobservable and the speaker's interest, we propose a novel, adjective-free listening definition: the degree of devotion to co-exploring the Other with and for the other. Adopting a dyadic view, we argue that either the listener or the speaker can generate such devotion and initiate the co-creation of a listening state. Our new definition can contribute to developing empirical measures with good discriminant validity.

Virtual social interactions during the COVID-19 pandemic: the effect of interpersonal motor synchrony on social interactions in the virtual space.

Although the link between motor synchrony and emotional alignment has been extensively studied during face-to-face interaction, the question of whether this association also exists in virtual settings has remained unanswered. Here, we examined whether this link exists during virtual social interactions and whether pro-social effects will be induced during those interactions. To this end, two strangers shared difficulties they have experienced due to the COVID-19 pandemic during a virtual social interaction that included both audio and video. The findings revealed that motor synchrony and emotional alignment can arise spontaneously during a virtual social interaction between two strangers. Moreover, this interaction yielded a decrease in negative affect and an increase in positive affect, as well as an increase in feelings of trust, liking, cohesion, self-other overlap, and similarity between the strangers. Finally, a higher level of synchrony during the virtual interaction was specifically associated with increased positive emotional alignment and liking. It can thus be presumed that virtual social interactions may share similar characteristics and social effects as face-to-face interactions. Considering the tremendous changes the COVID-19 pandemic has caused regarding social communication, these findings may provide grounds for developing new intervention protocols aimed at dealing with the consequences of social distancing.

Our Fragile Relationships: Relationship Threat and Its Effect on the Allure of Alternative Mates.

Long-term romantic commitments may offer many benefits. It is thus unsurprising that people employ strategies that help protect their relationships against the allure of alternative partners. The present research focused on the circumstances under which these strategies are less effective. Specifically, four studies examined the effect of internal relationship threat on expressions of desire for alternative mates. In Study 1, participants reported perceptions of relationship threat, their desire for their partner, and expressions of attraction to alternative mates. In Studies 2-4, participants underwent a threat manipulation and then encountered attractive strangers. Their reactions during these encounters (expressed interest, provision of help, and overt flirtation in Studies 2, 3, and 4, respectively) were recorded. Results showed that experiencing threat led to increased expressions of desire for alternatives. As indicated in Studies 1 and 2, decreased desire for current partners partially explained this effect, suggesting that desire functions as a gauge of romantic compatibility, ensuring that only valued relationships are maintained.

What Fantasies Can Do to Your Relationship: The Effects of Sexual Fantasies on Couple Interactions.

Research addressing the underlying functions of sexual fantasies has mainly focused on variables associated with frequency and content of fantasies. Relatively less is known about how sexual fantasizing affects the relationship. Four studies examined the contribution of fantasizing about one's partner ("dyadic fantasies") to relationship outcomes. In Studies 1 and 2, participants fantasized either about their partner or about someone else and rated their desire to engage in sex and other nonsexual relationship-promoting activities with their partner. In Studies 3 and 4, romantic partners recorded their fantasies and relationship interactions each evening for a period of 21 and 42 days, respectively. In Study 4, partners also provided daily reports on relationship perceptions. Overall, dyadic fantasizing was associated with heightened desire and increased engagement in relationship-promoting behaviors. Relationship perceptions explained the link between dyadic fantasies and relationship-promoting behaviors, suggesting that such fantasies benefit the relationship by enhancing partner and relationship appeal.

Sex Unleashes Your Tongue: Sexual Priming Motivates Self-Disclosure to a New Acquaintance and Interest in Future Interactions.

Research has demonstrated the contribution of sexual activity to the quality of ongoing relationships. Nevertheless, less attention has been given to how activation of the sexual system affects relationship-initiation processes. Three studies used complementary methodologies to examine the effect of sexual priming on self-disclosure, a relationship-promoting behavior. In Study 1, participants were subliminally exposed to sexual stimuli (vs. neutral stimuli), and then disclosed over Instant Messenger a personal event to an opposite-sex stranger. Results showed that merely thinking about sex, even without being aware of it, encouraged self-disclosure. Study 2 replicated these findings in relatively naturalistic conditions (live face-to-face interactions following supraliminal video priming). Study 3 extended these findings, indicating that sexual priming facilitated self-disclosure, which, in turn, increased interest in future interactions with the stranger. Together, these findings suggest that activation of the sexual system encourages the use of strategies that allow people to become closer to potential partners.

Intimately connected: The importance of partner responsiveness for experiencing sexual desire.

Sexual desire tends to subside gradually over time, with many couples failing to maintain desire in their long-term relationships. Three studies employed complementary methodologies to examine whether partner responsiveness, an intimacy-building behavior, could instill desire for one's partner. In Study 1, participants were led to believe that they would interact online with their partner. In reality, they interacted with either a responsive or an unresponsive confederate. In Study 2, participants interacted face-to-face with their partner, and judges coded their displays of responsiveness and sexual desire. Study 3 used a daily experiences methodology to examine the mechanisms underlying the responsiveness-desire linkage. Overall, responsiveness was associated with increased desire, but more strongly in women. Feeling special and perceived partner mate value explained the responsiveness-desire link, suggesting that responsive partners were seen as making one feel valued as well as better potential mates for anyone and thus as more sexually desirable. (PsycINFO Database Record

Right or flawed: relationship obsessions and sexual satisfaction.

INTRODUCTION: Relationship obsessive-compulsive disorder (ROCD) is marked by the presence of obsessions and compulsions focusing on romantic relationships. ROCD symptoms were previously linked with decreased relationship quality and might interfere with sexual functioning. AIM: The study aims to examine the association between ROCD symptoms and sexual satisfaction. METHODS: Participants completed an online survey assessing ROCD symptoms and relationship and sexual satisfaction levels. Depression, general worry, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) symptoms, and attachment orientation were also measured. MAIN OUTCOME MEASURE: The main outcome measures were self reported relationship satisfaction and sexual satisfaction. RESULTS: ROCD symptoms were associated with decreased sexual satisfaction over and above symptoms of depression, general worry, OCD, and attachment orientation. The link between ROCD symptoms and sexual satisfaction was mediated by relationship satisfaction. CONCLUSIONS: Identifying and addressing ROCD symptoms may be important for treatment of sexual functioning.

When sex goes wrong: a behavioral systems perspective on individual differences in sexual attitudes, motives, feelings, and behaviors.

In the research program summarized here, we adopted a behavioral systems approach to explain individual differences in human sexual behavior. In the 1st stage, we developed the Sexual System Functioning Scale (SSFS)-a self-report instrument for assessing hyperactivation and deactivation of the sexual system. Sexual hyperactivation involves intense but anxious expressions of sexual desire, whereas sexual deactivation includes inhibition of sexual inclinations. In subsequent stages, we administered the SFSS to 18 samples to determine its structural, convergent, discriminant, and predictive validity as well as its nomological network. We found that SSFS deactivation and hyperactivation scores are meaningfully associated with existing measures of sexual attitudes, motives, feelings, and behaviors and with measures of personal and interpersonal well-being. Moreover, the scores predict cognitive, affective, physiological, and behavioral responses to sexual stimuli. Implications of our findings for understanding the potential of sex for both joy and distress are discussed.